Post by MIRIAM JACOB on Mar 15, 2013 11:02:14 GMT -5
SAIRAH GEORGE MATTACKAL
Today (February 25, 2013) marks one year since my Sairah was called home to the presence of her Lord. One part of me wanted to let this moment pass without any comment. After all, I thought, what is so significant about one year? Nothing really changes at the one year point. The situation is much the same, the challenges are much the same, the emotions are much the same. But then, I also know that as human beings we tend to view the completion of one year of anything as a milestone for reflection. Also, I know that there are many of you, perhaps thousands, all over the world that pray for us regularly and I owe it to each of you to say something.
Well one thing I can say is that God has brought us through one year. It has not been easy, but here we are. And I know that the same God who has been faithful in seeing us through one year will see us through the next and all the years that lie ahead. Indeed the words of the hymn ring true in our life: “Great is thy faithfulness, morning by morning new mercies I see, all I have needed thy hand has provided, Great is thy faithfulness, Lord unto me”. I just need to keep reminding myself of this during those many down moments.
Then there are so many things as I look back over the past year for which I am thankful to God. I am thankful for his Word, the Bible. Living, powerful and sharper than a two-edged sword, a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. Over the past year I have been more faithful in my daily reading of God’s word. It has convicted, comforted, encouraged, corrected and chastened. And yes there has been so much need for correction and chastening in my life. It seems to be directed right at the need of the moment. Passages I had read before many times came alive in a new way in the light of the circumstances of the past year. I love God’s word so much more.
I am thankful for the hymns of the faith. How rich, how comforting, how they so exactly capture what you are going through at that moment and give hope. Contemporary music is okay, and I enjoy it too, but nothing mesures up to the richness of the old hymns. I was reminded of this again last night at family prayer when my 3- year-old said, "Let's sing,'What a friend we have in Jesus". Wow! How apt. “Have we trials and temptations? is there trouble anywhere? We should never be discouraged, Take it to the Lord in prayer. Can we find a friend so faithful, Who will all our sorrows share? Jesus knows our every weakness, Take it to the Lord in prayer.” Out of the mouth of babes …
I am thankful for the prayers of the people of God. How many we have met this past year from all around the world, who have told us they are praying. I know these prayers have played no small part in helping us get through the year. Thank you to all of you who pray for us regularly. Your prayers are worth much more than you will know. May God reward you richly, and please do keep praying and do not grow weary.
I am thankful for the strength and support of my kids. I have heard no complaints about mom being gone, no blaming of God for circumstances. They have just gone on with their lives and adjusted so miraculously. They have put up with Dad’s tensions and bad moods. The elder ones, in particular, have been a pillar of strength, stepping up to shoulder so much responsibility. Most everyone after Sairah’s death, and even now, worry about the kids. I have found them to be so resilient and a picture of the grace of God.
I am thankful for those who have supported us practically and stood by us. Many said “let us know if there is anything we can do to help”. A few stepped up and have done what was needed without us even asking, and they have done it sacrificially. We are so blessed to have these dear ones in our life. I am not going to name them as none of them want to be named. Those who taught the kids for much of the year and those who come each day of the week to take care of Josiah and things around the house, pouring their love into us in practical ways. They figure out what needs to be done for the home, for the kids, and just do it. We don’t deserve it, it is only the grace of God. I will never be able to adequately repay them. May God richly bless those who have been for us the hands and feet of Christ.
Much to be thankful for … but also many challenges, doubts, fears, frustrations, questions, difficult emotions, tears. In addition to Sairah’s passing there have been other things that shook me this past year. There are so many many moments of discouragement. The weight of the responsibility, now to be shouldered by myself, can pull down so easily. Dealing with loneliness and the loss of ones helpmeet and soulmate is not an easy thing. Trust me, unless you have been through it, you have no idea what it feels like. And I can tell you that so far, time does not make it easier. I still have no idea what God’s greater plan is in all this, but I am also learning that one must patiently wait to see His ways. “My ways are not your ways, neither are my thoughts your thoughts.” And I am learning that I cannot try to force my solutions onto Him. And I find myself on my knees so much more. Patience - a fruit of the spirit that does not come easy to most.
I know there is much more to go in this journey, many unknown twists and turns yet to come. But I’m trying hard to take it one day at a time, one moment at a time, trusting in my savior and my God. Please do pray with us as we continue on this journey that God has ordained for us.
Closing with the words of the hymn writer – “We’ll praise Him for all that is past, and trust Him for all that’s to come.”
© George Mattackal
Today (February 25, 2013) marks one year since my Sairah was called home to the presence of her Lord. One part of me wanted to let this moment pass without any comment. After all, I thought, what is so significant about one year? Nothing really changes at the one year point. The situation is much the same, the challenges are much the same, the emotions are much the same. But then, I also know that as human beings we tend to view the completion of one year of anything as a milestone for reflection. Also, I know that there are many of you, perhaps thousands, all over the world that pray for us regularly and I owe it to each of you to say something.
Well one thing I can say is that God has brought us through one year. It has not been easy, but here we are. And I know that the same God who has been faithful in seeing us through one year will see us through the next and all the years that lie ahead. Indeed the words of the hymn ring true in our life: “Great is thy faithfulness, morning by morning new mercies I see, all I have needed thy hand has provided, Great is thy faithfulness, Lord unto me”. I just need to keep reminding myself of this during those many down moments.
Then there are so many things as I look back over the past year for which I am thankful to God. I am thankful for his Word, the Bible. Living, powerful and sharper than a two-edged sword, a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. Over the past year I have been more faithful in my daily reading of God’s word. It has convicted, comforted, encouraged, corrected and chastened. And yes there has been so much need for correction and chastening in my life. It seems to be directed right at the need of the moment. Passages I had read before many times came alive in a new way in the light of the circumstances of the past year. I love God’s word so much more.
I am thankful for the hymns of the faith. How rich, how comforting, how they so exactly capture what you are going through at that moment and give hope. Contemporary music is okay, and I enjoy it too, but nothing mesures up to the richness of the old hymns. I was reminded of this again last night at family prayer when my 3- year-old said, "Let's sing,'What a friend we have in Jesus". Wow! How apt. “Have we trials and temptations? is there trouble anywhere? We should never be discouraged, Take it to the Lord in prayer. Can we find a friend so faithful, Who will all our sorrows share? Jesus knows our every weakness, Take it to the Lord in prayer.” Out of the mouth of babes …
I am thankful for the prayers of the people of God. How many we have met this past year from all around the world, who have told us they are praying. I know these prayers have played no small part in helping us get through the year. Thank you to all of you who pray for us regularly. Your prayers are worth much more than you will know. May God reward you richly, and please do keep praying and do not grow weary.
I am thankful for the strength and support of my kids. I have heard no complaints about mom being gone, no blaming of God for circumstances. They have just gone on with their lives and adjusted so miraculously. They have put up with Dad’s tensions and bad moods. The elder ones, in particular, have been a pillar of strength, stepping up to shoulder so much responsibility. Most everyone after Sairah’s death, and even now, worry about the kids. I have found them to be so resilient and a picture of the grace of God.
I am thankful for those who have supported us practically and stood by us. Many said “let us know if there is anything we can do to help”. A few stepped up and have done what was needed without us even asking, and they have done it sacrificially. We are so blessed to have these dear ones in our life. I am not going to name them as none of them want to be named. Those who taught the kids for much of the year and those who come each day of the week to take care of Josiah and things around the house, pouring their love into us in practical ways. They figure out what needs to be done for the home, for the kids, and just do it. We don’t deserve it, it is only the grace of God. I will never be able to adequately repay them. May God richly bless those who have been for us the hands and feet of Christ.
Much to be thankful for … but also many challenges, doubts, fears, frustrations, questions, difficult emotions, tears. In addition to Sairah’s passing there have been other things that shook me this past year. There are so many many moments of discouragement. The weight of the responsibility, now to be shouldered by myself, can pull down so easily. Dealing with loneliness and the loss of ones helpmeet and soulmate is not an easy thing. Trust me, unless you have been through it, you have no idea what it feels like. And I can tell you that so far, time does not make it easier. I still have no idea what God’s greater plan is in all this, but I am also learning that one must patiently wait to see His ways. “My ways are not your ways, neither are my thoughts your thoughts.” And I am learning that I cannot try to force my solutions onto Him. And I find myself on my knees so much more. Patience - a fruit of the spirit that does not come easy to most.
I know there is much more to go in this journey, many unknown twists and turns yet to come. But I’m trying hard to take it one day at a time, one moment at a time, trusting in my savior and my God. Please do pray with us as we continue on this journey that God has ordained for us.
Closing with the words of the hymn writer – “We’ll praise Him for all that is past, and trust Him for all that’s to come.”
© George Mattackal